When you get engaged there is magic in the air; emotions and romance are at an all-time high. You and your fiancé begin to dream about the future and where life will take you as you join your lives together. The magic and butterflies encase you and it feels like life couldn’t be any sweeter… but then, the wedding planning begins.
First you have to agree on a venue, then you have to pick a date, decide on the guest list, flowers, the wedding dress, wedding party save-the-dates, invitations, food, music and so on… it’s a lot. Then on top of it all there are those pesky unsolicited opinions from everyone you know come pouring in from left and right– it can quickly become very overwhelming. I’ve been there! So, here are 4 things I wish I had kept in mind to help you stay in love as you plan your wedding!
1. Have an agreed upon response to unsolicited advice
People love to share their advice and opinion; they always have and always will. So, instead of allowing all the “advice” to cause you to stress out, simply agree with your spouse to say something like “thank you so much! We’ll definitely keep that in mind”. Then later on, you can either seriously discuss the ideas you’ve heard, or disregard them. Either way, this is YOUR wedding. So own it!
2. Have FUN!
This sounds simple, but planning one of the biggest days of your life should actually be fun. Your wedding is supposed to be a reflection of your love story, so if you and your fiancé get to a place where you feel like you’re not having fun and are instead overwhelmed and stressed out by all the decisions you have to make… take a break and spend some quality time together! Go on a fun date with no wedding talk allowed.
3. Remember what you’re working toward
While an important marker in your relationship, your wedding day is not the end goal of all of your hard work. Instead, it’s the beginning of your marriage and of your married life together. So, when you and your fiancé disagree or feel divided, remember that at the end of the day, the goal is to build a marriage that will last a lifetime. Pull out some of our connecting questions, utilize our top resources in our Marriage365 membership, or talk about some traditions you would like to start together once you’re married.
4. Take our online Premarital Course Happily Ever After
The same way that expecting-parents create a nursery and nest in anticipation for the arrival of their newborn, an engaged couple anticipating marriage should build a strong foundation for their marriage and take a premarital course. So many of us were not taught how to properly work through our own feelings, deal with conflict or properly apologize- all things that are foundational and important for a healthy and happy marriage!